What’s in the backpack you are carrying?
Motherhood: The 3rd Chapter – How to transition into your 50’s and beyond with Joy, Confidence and Vitality.
This was the title of the interview series last year and I have been thinking more about my transition over the past few months…
Times of transition are great times to look at what you have, to determine what you no longer need, to rethink your priorities and to move forward with intention.
But, they are also hard and uncomfortable times!
We doubt ourselves and struggle to make decisions, often wanting to run away or get others to make the decisions for us.
Transition is hard because it involves change and change takes us out of our comfort zones. When we make a change it is important to recognise that we don’t start at the very beginning again all the way back at square 1.
You may feel like you are moving backwards but you are starting with all the knowledge, experience, life lessons and skills you have already accumulated on your journey – none of this is lost!
What this also means though is that unless your mindset, self beliefs and habits transition then you will find it incredibly challenging to make the changes you are wanting to.
I listened to Rick Hanson (author of the books Resilient, Hardwiring Happiness and others) talk to Marie Forleo on MarieTV discussing How to Build Unshakeable Inner Strength Using Neuroscience. Rick said “The thing I can do no matter about the past, is to learn and grow from here.”
They were discussing how to Grow the strengths inside yourself. Are you supporting yourself and believing in your ability to grow and get better? Taking time to stop and internalise the good experiences we have – whether as simple as enjoying a cup of tea in the sunshine or achieving something momentous – this helps overcome the negative bias our brains have.
Rick described it like our brains being a sieve and all the good emotions and positive experiences flow straight through, but the one or two negative ones get caught and that is all we remember at the end of the day. How many times has that happened to you when you’ve had an awesome day getting S#@& done but when you sit down at the end of the evening all you can think of is the one thing you didn’t do or the one negative comment someone made about your work?!
Taking the time to sit with the positives, to really feel them in your body, helps hardwire the feeling into your nervous system so you can take it with you and draw on it at a later date to help cope with the stresses life deals you. You in essence put it in your ‘backpack’ to pull out when needed and as Rick says “when you’re in the bush what is in your backpack, your inner supplies, is far more important than what is in your wallet.”
So as you work to transition during your life consider what is already in your backpack… are there some rocks you could do with putting down? Are there some supplies you need for the next chapter of your journey? Can you be more intentional with what you pop into your backpack – after all you will be carrying it!! I truly hope there is joy, confidence and vitality going into your pack!
If you would like to watch the entire interview click here, it is definitely worth the 30 minutes of your time.